Jim Livingstone

01 May 2024

ADHD with JIM LIVINGSTONE

Hello, and Welcome

G’day,

I struggled with undiagnosed ADHD for forty-six years, feeling like I didn’t fit in anywhere.

Since my ADHD diagnosis, I have spent the past twenty-six years reading, researching and testing every aspect of adult ADHD with the desire to become the very best version of myself.

Here are a few things I’ve learned along the way….

ADHD and RISING DIAGNOSIS

The media has been telling us that there has been a huge spike in people being diagnosed with ADHD, many later in life. Some suggest it is now fashionable to have ADHD.

More high-profile people have come forward and talked about both the challenges and benefits of their ADHD. Recently, Emily Skye, an Australian fitness icon and a highly successful businesswoman, mum to two children who shares her very full life with her long-term partner and fiance, was diagnosed at 39.

In a very open and honest article, Skye tells it like it is and shows the masking and challenges she faced and is still learning how to manage her ADHD while maintaining her daily responsibilities.

The former model and make-up artist is so successful she’s made several appearances on the Australian Financial Review’s Young Rich list. In short, her life is like a vision board.

But Skye has never seen herself as picture-perfect. For most of these years she felt strange, the odd one out. She never fit in. A super-sensitive overthinker with an intense fear of rejection, Skye thought that she was unintelligent, incompetent and unlovable. Loaded: 0%

“I never belonged anywhere,” “We all need feelings of belonging and being loved and accepted. So, I did whatever I could to get those feelings.” Skye became an expert mimic from a young age. “I subconsciously studied the way people behaved; their mannerisms, what they talked about, how they dressed. 

I didn’t know how to act socially, or what the right thing to do was. Other people always seemed to just pick it up.” 

“I felt completely broken and abnormal for not being able to retain information. Even later in board meetings, I’d be off with the fairies.” If a topic did pique Skye’s interest, such as art, English, drama and, eventually, fitness, she could be hyper-focused.

When Skye was diagnosed with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) earlier this year, at age 39, her life suddenly made sense. She realised her perceived shortcomings were not her fault. “My brain is just wired differently.”

People said to me, ‘You’re 39, why bother getting diagnosed now? You don’t want a label.’ But, for me, the ‘label’ has allowed me to identify what it is and how to manage it better.” It’s also helping Skye reframe her brain, build her confidence and see the positives in her neurodiversity. “I’m learning to love myself,” she says. 

“It takes a lot to reprogram those thought patterns and beliefs that you have about yourself. It’s all just been a certain way for so long.” 

I believe we are seeing the tip of the iceberg, and ADHD is grossly underdiagnosed, especially in women. We need to increase the availability and speed for getting a professional diagnosis and continue to raise awareness of this very real and treatable mental health issue.

To read the full article, go to Emily Skye: smart, successful and just diagnosed with ADHD – Body+Soul

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Use your late ADHD diagnosis as a New Beginning to remove the roadblocks holding you back and to develop emotional strength and self-belief.

You’re capable, worthy and deserving just as you are. Forge a new path to capitalise on your ADHD strengths and skills.

Peek Inside My Book…here is an unedited extract from Chapter 8

MANAGING RELATIONSHIPS 

– Discussing Your Diagnosis

   – One to One

   – Family Dynamics

   – Your Relationship with YOU 

Receiving a later-in-life ADHD diagnosis can significantly impact your relationships, particularly with a partner or spouse and family members.

Discussing your ADHD diagnosis with family, friends, and loved ones can be a crucial step towards better understanding, support, and managing the challenges as they arise.

DISCUSSING YOUR DIAGNOSIS 

Opening up about your diagnosis requires courage and vulnerability, as it involves sharing personal details about your mental health journey.

The diagnosis often explains longstanding challenges with organisation, time allocation, attention span, and impulsivity to name a few.

It allows you to express your needs, preferences, and concerns while also providing an opportunity for others to share their thoughts, ask questions, and engage in meaningful dialogue.

Communicating Your Diagnosis is Important:

 Building Awareness:

Explaining your adult ADHD diagnosis can help your family, friends, and loved ones gain a better understanding of the condition. Educating them about ADHD will help them to recognise the symptoms, appreciate the challenges you face, and promote empathy.

 Seeking Support:

Sharing your diagnosis creates an opportunity for your loved ones to offer support. By understanding ADHD, they can provide the necessary encouragement and assistance you may need to manage symptoms and navigate everyday life.

 Strengthening Communication:

Discussing your diagnosis promotes open and honest communication channels with your loved ones.

 First, Educate Yourself:

Before initiating the conversation, make sure you have a solid understanding of adult ADHD and have relevant information, resources, and personal insights to answer any questions or concerns that may arise. This knowledge will enhance your confidence and credibility during the discussion.

Choose the Right Timing and Setting:

Pick an appropriate time and place to have a calm and uninterrupted conversation. Select a time when everyone is relaxed and free from distractions, ensuring you have enough time to discuss the topic fully.

 Express Your Emotions:

Share your experiences, emotions, and the impact ADHD has had on your life. Be open about the challenges, frustrations, and successes you have encountered. Sharing your personal stories can help your loved ones relate to your experiences and foster empathy.

Be sure to share the positive aspects and traits of ADHD. It’s not all negative. Use your sense of humour to lighten the conversation.

 Provide Information:

Explain the symptoms, common difficulties, and the treatment options available for adult ADHD. Share specific strategies you use to cope with challenges to help your loved ones understand the steps you take for self-management.

 Encourage Questions and Discussion:

Assure your loved ones that you welcome their questions and concerns. Encourage open dialogue and active listening to create space for them to share their thoughts, ask for clarification, and express their support.

Set Realistic Expectations:

Make it clear that ADHD is a lifelong condition that will require ongoing management. Emphasise that your diagnosis is not an excuse but an understanding that can lead to personal growth and improved self-care.

By approaching these conversations with empathy, knowledge, and honesty, you can strengthen your relationships and cultivate an environment of acceptance, empathy, and compassion.

Remember, everyone’s understanding is unique, and their responses may vary. Keep the lines of communication open, allowing for ongoing discussions and continued support as you navigate life with ADHD.

  ONE TO ONE

 Let’s explore the challenges experienced when navigating the unique dynamics of a one-on-one relationship with your spouse or significant other.

be continued next week………

“See your later-in-life diagnosis as Your New Beginning.”

Jim Livingstone

Let me know what you think, the good, the bad and wtf?…link to comments on website

PS Love to hear your story if you want to share.

ADHD is a natural neurodivergent variation of the human brain. The world is made up of massive variations of species. We are but one variation designed by nature. As Einstein said, “Don’t ask a fish to climb a tree; it will appear stupid”. 

Be your natural ADHD self

READERS REVIEWS

“Overall, ADHD ADULTS is an informative and compassionate book that offers valuable insights into ADHD. It is a must-read for anyone who has ADHD or knows someone who does.

Don’t give up on yourself or let ADHD define you. You are capable of achieving great things, and with the right tools and mindset, you can overcome any obstacle that comes your way.

Nandini

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Download your complimentary PDF of the first couple of chapters.

Or if you have already and want to buy a copy

https://www.amazon.com//dp/B0BHKQV96M

Expect the Best,

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If you’ve got a second, I would love to hear your thoughts and comments. jim@jimlivingstone.com.au I reply to every email.

This site is not intended to provide and does not constitute medical, legal, or other professional advice. The content in this newsletter is designed to support, not replace, medical or psychiatric treatment. Please seek professional help if you believe you may have Mental Health Issues.

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